Not Everything is What it Seems

 

            When you are young you think of the things you wanted in life. You are so adamant as if they will happen with great certainty.

            Reckon your days in school, teachers used to ask the famous question, “what is your ambition in life?”, or what you want to become when you grow older?”, and of course being naïve, you will reply with such  conviction, that you want to become a doctor, a lawyer, a diplomat or you want to have a business of your own. Next thing you know you began making plans, outlining the steps in achieving them to the extent that nobody can bend them, you would talk to your parents about your goals and as always, they will listen with joy that you have already envisioned your future. Funny, there are times you tend to get so excited that you wish you can foresee what future has for you.

            Years went by, what have you become? Are you now in the shoes of the person you dreamed of? Reality bites but not everyone got lucky. There could be a thousand reasons why the course of your life has changed. It might have caused by the layers of prejudice:  like, the society you were in, or circumstances didn’t give you the chance to prove your worth, or sometimes you don’t want to hurt the feelings of the people you love and so with your eyes closed you just followed, or maybe with all those goals, you got confused which one should have given a priority.

            There are cases also that you strive so hard to get things done so that someday you could be that person you have pictured yourself to be… but life is not what it seems. No matter how you try for your “dream jewel” is just not meant for you. It would hurt at times when people tend to be inquisitive asking questions such as:  have you done things right, or did you really try your might, are you sure you did things according to your plan. How do they know? These are the downfalls that can pull you down that absence of strong pillars of strength you might lose it in a snap.

            Yes, it’s frustrating, it’s heartbreaking and most of the time it could tear you apart when you have come to a realization that you failed to achieve the goals that you knew were destined for you. But are we ought to question the will of God? What matter the most is that you never quit in trying, and you’re steadfast that never have you failed in fighting. So when at the end of the tunnel you didn’t get what you expected- it’s not for you, acknowledge it! Embrace it!

            Cliché dictates “life must go on”, you should not lose hope for God doesn’t want you to be miserable for the rest of your life. You just need to search further until you find what is really intended for you. Sometimes we insist on something that we thought is meant for us, but little did we know something grandeur awaits. Go and painstakingly try to continue your journey until you make your own mark . . . we just have to look for it and never give up as life may not always be what it seems but you see, life will be better if you just believe.

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So painful it bites!

I dont know why a person has to be in so much grief. Yes, “everything happens for a reason”, I am on that, but why does it have to be so deep that it tends you to ask,”why god?” its depth makes you want to scream until you lost your breath; punch somebody or pick a fight, or throw the things whatever your hands can reach. . . Then cry!! Cry and cry your heart out and blame him or ask him “Why?” for a countless times.

Why does a person have to suffer more than one pain, more than you can bear? Can it be one at a time? So there is a room for a breather.

Seeing all the unfortunate events happening all at the same time are not fair; unfair for the person who suffers and for the other who gets to see the suffering. It is so painful that if you could only just erase everything; like when you are erasing the words or figures on the board. So intense that you wish that if you could just teleport to a place where you can reflect and rejuvinate your body and soul for a while, or you just want to close your eyes and ears and wishing that they were all just a dream.

But reality bites! We are on earth where you experience variety of life. So what is left of that person? Cry and suck everything in and embrace that this is the will of the divine providence. It is just too painful to see everyone in such distress. And its so hard to accept that they are actually in that situation. It seems like it is so unreal.

A person should not be questioning God as he knows best, but that person cant help to ask, Why God?

A punch in the gut!!

I pity you. You used to look down on people because you thought you were better than them. You prefer your friends as if they really have given you an unconditional strength, but what have you become out of it?You neither respect your parents nor your siblings- but it really does not surprise me, for you do not even respect your own being. You have lived your life in a fantasy wherein you were the star, as if you were a celebrity and blinded by the idea that as if you had no imperfections, as if.

As god is my witness, I supported you, I exhausted all my might just to understand you and “the benefit of the doubt I have given you was beyond and you know that. However, it seems you did not care and still you care less, because truth be told you do not give a darn, so long as you do what satisfy you nonetheless. Now, you even had the nerve to show disrespects and treat everything as if it has been forgotten? That can be done but the problem is that you are a recidivist.

Now, what have you become? Are you proud of yourself for engaging into all of it? Are you bothered that someone is hurting that it might cause her death? How do you feel when you get to see those people whom you looked down onto, that they have become over the top successful- does it hurt? Wait, do you even get that feeling of regret or remorse or even pain of so much depth that it is tearing you apart? Based on my observations you feel none of that, I am not judging you as I have tons of evidence to prove it.

Should you choose to continue being what you are, may God protect the only person who will be deeply wounded by your monstrous ways of living.

I hope God has plans for you for I do not know what will you become.

Please, smile!

Sister, it is not your fault nor anybody’s misdeed but rather it is the will of God; can you question that? Yes, we are going through this turmoil, the quintessential kind of pain that nobody would even wish to bare–but we still have hope, havent we? We can still rely on the mercy of God so hold on there.

I am not putting a facade that I am strong, or my actions does not speak that I am not wounded of what is happening to her, for I am also in sorrow. But someone needs to be the pillar of strength otherwise who will? We may be facing this difficulties but note that God does not want us to be in this situation for no reason at all.

You have been doing all you can in order to protect her; everything that you can provide to her you give it, but you can only do so much. God has his swift way of showing his love and affection to his beings that so hard to fathom. Sometimes we tend to rebel against his will but he is our creator and we are just his creations. The only thing that we left to do is pray hard, harder and if possible hardest as “faith can move mountains”. Let us just close our eyes, open our hearts and leave everything to the most merciful.

The support your giving to your sister is countless and you may have not notice, it is draining your energy; yet you still continue nevertheless and bless you for that. You may not know how it has been appreciated by your clan. But above all these, do not forget to smile, always be remembered to seize the day because God has plans for her, for us and for everybody.

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It has been your gift to make people smile, you mimick Jim Carey just to crack a joke for everyone to laugh upon. But you should also be reminded that you deserve to smile- you owe it to yourself. So do not say that you have forgotten how to smile because that is exactly what we need at times like this. I am cynical and I really hate to say this but “everything happens for a reason”, annoying but I want to believe that there is a truth behind those words that we should look forward to. Leave it to Allah (swta) as he knows best. Hence, we must painstakingly face whatever God wants us to see, feel or endure. So please do not forget to smile my dear sister- SMILE!!